BLESSINGS FROM HEAVEN

My Dad.
My Dad.  He loved his family more than anything. He was smart. He was kind. He was helpful. He was quiet, but extremely observant. When he did speak up, it meant something. He was a big guy that frightened off lousy boyfriends and kept my sister and I out of trouble... for the most part.  Nothing was worst than disappointing my Dad. Yet I know in my heart that no matter how many times I may have disappointed him, he loved me still. Dad loved me like our Father in heaven -- constant, never wavering, even when I felt I didn't deserve it. 

Dad & Colby

Dad left this earth 18 years ago today. It was a Sunday. I remember too vividly. Daddy had melanoma. He worked up until he just couldn't work any more -- just a couple of months before he died.  That's just how he was. He worked hard. Sometimes in a job he couldn't stand, but he did it anyway. He had a job for many years that ate at him so much that it made him sick in the morning before work.  I would have never known it, but Mom told us years later, maybe to show us how much Dad really loved us and put us before himself.

Saying Goodbye.
When things took a turn for the worst, Daddy took time to say his goodbyes to each of us. I'll never forget him telling me that he knew Amy would be fine. She had Jody and Daddy had no doubt that he would always care for her.  He told me I would be fine on my own, which I couldn't understand at the time; but it became clear shortly after he passed. He said I was smart and I had good common sense.   And he asked me to take care of my Mom.

All of that didn't mean as much to me as his final ask.  He encouraged me to finish college, because he never did and he said that it made things hard at times. He wanted me to enjoy my work. He said, "Life's too short to be unhappy."  He made me promise that if I wasn't happy, I would change something.

Those words will forever be a blessing to me.

When You're Unhappy, Make a Change.
I took those words very literal early on in my career.  I changed jobs more often than most people change the oil in their car.  When I became unhappy, I made a change. Unfortunately, I changed jobs instead of how I handled things. 

As I've grown in faith, I know that changing something is sometimes changing the situation, sometimes changing myself, and sometimes a combination of both. I no longer jump ship when unhappiness sets in, but rather I take time to evaluate the situation and myself. 
But why is it that when I had a brain tumor, I immediately turned to God, but when I have a non-life-threatening problem, it takes me awhile to realize I may need a deeper relationship with God so that He can guide me in how to make changes that lead back to fulfillment.  Recently, I think God has been giving me time in the valley to discover my need for Him is constant.

When I went back to work after my surgery, I would get up every morning and have breakfast with my daughter. As she watched cartoons, I read a daily devotional.  But as the scar began to heal, my routine began to change. I started sleeping in a little later and thought just saying my morning prayers was enough.  Well... it's not.

Time with God is time to set myself straight for the day. It helps me put things in perspective.  It opens my eyes to what God may be asking me to see.  It reminds me that my situations may be difficult, but with God all things are possible. That means that God can bring about change in a situation or He can bring about change in my heart. But in order for God to show me how he is working in my life, I must study His word, lean on Him in troubled times and ask His guidance in all I do.

Life is too short.
My Dad was right. Life is too short not to enjoy your work. He was 52 when his family stood around him and saw him take his last breath. We watch him open his eyes, look to heaven and see Jesus calling him home. From that day, I have never once doubted that God was real. I saw him through the loss of my Dad. And years later I saw God again as he gave me the guidance and protection I needed by carrying me through brain surgery -- giving me new life.

I will never understand why God took my Dad, but spared me. Perhaps the influence he had on our family, and others was fulfilling God's plan, whereas He's not done with me yet.  Perhaps there is something more for me to accomplish before He calls me home.

Why my thoughts today carried me from the ever present sadness of losing my Dad to the need to spend more time in God's word, I'm not sure.  Perhaps remembering my Dad reminds me of the day I saw for myself that God called my Daddy home to a better place where he is enjoying his work in heaven. Or maybe God led me to seek his word to carry me through the next few days when memories of losing my Dad weigh heavy on my heart. Whatever the reason, I certainly can't argue that I need to make a change to seek God's word more deeply and more often.

My Dad was an amazing Dad and a blessing to me and many others; he continues to be a blessing in my life through memories. I can celebrate the memories he gave me during his time on earth. And I can cherish the memory he left me with as he entered the kingdom of heaven.

My Dad -- was, is and always will be a blessing from heaven.  I truly am blessed.  I have two wonderful fathers watching over me from heaven -- God our Father and my Dad.